Paper Doll Halloween Costume

Source- Family Fun

This is my dream Halloween costume. My childhood was filled with paper dolls. Each month I would wait for my mom's McCall's magazine, excited by the promise of a new Besty McCall  paper doll.
While Betsy was fun, she was a little girl. Even as a five year old, I longed to be an adult. My bride and groom paper dolls might not have been made of flesh, but they were grown ups.

While many a tab was accidentally snipped off, as I painstakingly cut out the outfits, I simply invented the Land of Crooked, a place ruled by Queen Off Kilter. What I lacked in eye hand coordination, I made up for in imagination

All these years later, I am still ruling, and still mighty crooked.


Floor Cleaning with Pantiliners

Thinking I would do a bit of Googling, in hopes to pad this blog post (love those pathetic puns), I came upon info that, well, I just did not want to read. Damn it! As if I am not neurotic enough, I have to read this:
Danger of wearing pantyliner everyday

No, no, no, I will never give up my pantyliners. I love the fresh feeling their use as a floor cleaner, which I will explain in a moment.

I am all too familiar with what some view as the absurdity of daily pad wearing, unless one is menstruating, or has incontinence. Back when the concept was new, I was eating dinner with my then beau's family, trying to feign sophistication, which when you are 19, is beyond silly.

It was bad enough that said guy wanted me to lie about my age, hoping his family wouldn't think of him as a cradle robber (he was), and that one of his nieces said I had a valley girl voice (I didn't). His sister started in on the ludicrousness of pantyliners. I sat silent back then, but never again.

Pantyliner are one the best inventions on earth. Yes, they are.  Not only do they catch errant drips of urine, blood, or vaginal secretions, but they are perfect for floor cleaning.

Upon removing your pantyliner, flip it sticky side out, and use it to catch a few hairs that have fallen to your bathroom floor. No matter how good of a housekeeper you think you are, there will always be hair, and fuzz.
Here's your proof:


Much Better

This glaring monstrosity has always bothered me.

No, not the always dusty, large black toaster, but the unused white plastic, phone jack thingy, that annoys me to no end. Yes, I am easily amused, and easily annoyed, making this mini project, a real winner.

Home Depot sells a textured, paintable cover. It took me close to two years to remember to buy one.
Now, staring at the wall is almost fun.